But no more. This story will be told.
I had actually projected this to be a very different sort of post. I was planning an intro that would lead into a much-anticipated surprise. Life, as it stands in the times we are living in currently, led a distinctly contrary way than expected. Ideally, I would have been posting this entry on April 2nd or 3rd perhaps, from clear halfway across the world.
Halfway across the world? Yes. Curious?Are you ready? Let's start!
*inhale*
To capture the whole story, we need to go aaaaallllll the way back to the summer of last year, shortly after returning home from Sorata, Bolivia.
July 2019
I had fallen so much in love with the congregation and territory that I had decided to move back. I mean, alone the Bolivian visa would last me 10 years; why not make good on it? I began getting into talks with my roomies to return by March 2020.
November 10, 2019
The headlines on my phone app echoed one theme: Bolivian President Ousted. In what seemed to be a blink of an eye, the whole nation turned on a head.
As the political climate changed, tensions between groups started brewing, culminating in riots, protests, and demonstrations. The friends stayed at home as events worsened, keeping safe and busy of course.
I don't think I've ever been so keen on one country's political situation in my life. I watched the updates like a hawk, eyeing cautiously as the international travel advisory warnings started creeping up. Level 2...then 3...then, inevitably, 4. As the States advised, along with talking with the brothers and sisters there and here, the plans fell through.
It was rough, but ultimately the wiser decision. I set my sights on a pretty normal, albeit busy, 2020, staying within the country at least until a planned late-October trip out to the Bible Lands. That is, until...
JANUARY 10, 2020
I received an unexpected message from my friend Sarah, who shall be called S2 in the blog. Friends and Bethel workmates for many years, we'd kept in contact consistently even after she moved to Cambodia to needgreat. After the Bolivia plans were cancelled, we had briefly talked about maybe serving together, but other things came up.
This time, however, was a different message.
Beloved Bluebearies, let me tell you, I was SHOCKED. I had been praying to Jehovah so hard about what direction to go in my service. Late 2019 had seen a number of changes in my life, so I was ready and available.
Thus began the FASTEST international trip prep I've done to date. What started as a month-long thing turned into a 2 month service expedition beginning in Cambodia in March, serving in India for 3 weeks, and finishing up the rest of May in Myanmar (with my other girlfriend Lajuan). I was mentally prepared to spend a Memorial for the first time away from my family. Tickets were bought, we started learning Indian Sign Language and Nepali, and research into visas and permits ensued.
I was happy, so very happy and excited.
March 12, 2020
The buzzword was Corona. No, not the beer. Not the Spanish word for crown. In the middle of trip planning (ESPECIALLY planning an Asia trip), this word began to creep into the world scene and sow seeds of doubt. S2, Lajuan, and I held on to the possibility as tightly as we each could.
No one could have told me that March 11 would be the last meeting at my Kingdom Hall. There was no telling how that text message to all of us Bethel workers would resound, telling us to stay put. If you would have told me that I'd be watching Gilead Graduation from my friend's home instead of Wallkill because of a global pandemic, I wouldn't have believed it.
Nobody could have warned me how much it would hurt to cancel all the plans, seeing them slip out of reach.
I will spare you all the genuine heartache that ensued in the following weeks, for this blog is not for sob stories or sadness. What would have been the excitement of buying and packing transformed into the frenzy of calling airlines and credit card companies, buying masks and gloves for protection instead of visas and travel insurance.
June 2020
As I sit here finally typing this, I can say truthfully (and maybe tearfully) that I am grateful to be where I am right now. The experience taught me lessons that I needed to learn, as well as tapping into strength and comfort I didn't know was there. I relied heavily on Jehovah and the support of my family and friends. This circumstance forced a metamorphosis I did not ask for but so obviously needed.
I only just left my house for the first time in 87 days this past Saturday. I stood on the mountainside, staring out at the cotton-candy sunset sky like a wide-eyed child. The whole car ride up was taken with a sense of awe. The sense of gratitude swelled as I inhaled the fresh air, surrounded by my masked loved ones. Not bad for a new normal, no?
To those who have truly lost, to those who have seen so much more than I might ever will, you are incredible. I see your faith and your resilience, and I desire that for myself. This situation affected us all, but I am privileged to see and be a part of a people whose integrity is solid to the One who loves us so so much. I look forward to seeing you in the flesh some time, but endless Zoom calls will suffice for now.
This time has helped me appreciate time, rest, and renewed focus. Jehovah has taken such fine care of us; the sadness gets squashed by the sheer AMAZING power He possesses and exercises for us.
Like I said, it only took me 2 months to build up the courage to share. It's been cathartic and relieving to free it from inside my brain. Here is a HUGE thank you for bearing with me spilling my emotional entrails on this post. You guys are splendiloquent and I love you so much!! Stay safe and stay tuned for the next set of adventures, because they'll be coming (tbd....)
Love,
The Adventurous A.
